CBC Literary Contest

It’s no secret that I’ve always had a dream of being an author. I’ve written since I learned how to arrange letters to make (some) sense. I’ve taken writing classes that I loved (and aced). I had a (stupid) poem published in my high school yearbook.  I’ve had  numerous blogs and journals.   I’ve self-published a poetry book.  I’ve attempted Nanowrimo numerous times. I have books and binders and hard drives full of pieces in various stages.

Yet I rarely reach completion of pieces. Or if I do… I do nothing about it.

Until a couple of months ago. Until I fell out of my comfort zone.

So not too many people know this… In fact I think the number of people who do is about 3. But… I actually did submit a piece I’d written to the CBC Literary Short Story contest.  The first submission since high school.

I didn’t place. But. Some strangers out there have read what I’ve written. I put myself out there. And I’m ridiculously pleased that I did that.

Maybe it’s time to dust off and try again with something bigger next time.

Random blathers from a sleep girl

Nanowrimo is coming to a close and I know I’m not going to finish.  And while I’m mildly upset that I won’t reach the 50,000 words in time, I’m not really that upset? But I’ll come back to that.

I’ve had a particularly busy month, and quite frankly, I’m completely exhausted.  But it’s been a good month and I owe a long post.  We’ll see if I can get the jist of it down while I’m at work, since I’m attempting to not fall asleep since I’m so tired right now.

I went to see Tori Amos with my old friend from high school, Emily, and her boyfriend.  Tori puts on a great show and it was really good to see Emily again.

Keiran came to visit last month.  I dragged her around and made her do all sorts of things with me. Heh.

Raine Maida busked downtown and I made Keiran come watch him with me when he was in the financial district.  It was a little awe-inspiring to be that close to someone whom you have worshipped music-wise for… my god has it really been over 10 years? Anyway, he used the footage as a music video (I saw me in there heh) and it’s posted up on his myspace.

I saw Matt Good when he was playing in Toronto.  I had a great seat and it lead to an experience that was beyond words.  I’ve heard him live before, and it was amazing, but the acoustical tour… was out of this world.  I have photos which will be posted eventually in my gallery.

I won two tickets to see Raine later on, from the mailing list.  Which, btw, I STILL can’t believe I won haha.  Alright, it was a free show to begin with, but the odds of me winning anything are slim to none to begin with.  And to win something like that… But yes, anyway, I dragged Emily with me (Well, she went willingly) and I had one heck of a good time.  Chantal was playing piano for him and that was cool too.

Hannah and I took a Community Mobilization course with the police.  I learned some interesting things, to say the least.  I feel better educated heh.

Whatever weekends were left in there, I was working.  Covering shifts and what-not.  The parents took me out last Sunday and we went to a Toy show where I bought some “nostalgia” toys.

Now that November is almost over, I can finally relax?  Except, you know, next comes the Christmas rush.

But yes, back to Nano.  I’m not upset about not making the goal.  I thought I would be.  But… Here’s the thing.  I’ve been surfing the Nano boards and I see all these people that now hate their story.  I was afraid I’d be one of them. These characters of mine… they’ve been a work in progress for years now.  And I don’t.  I’m still in love with my characters.  I still want to finish telling their story.  Finish guiding them through their life.  And I’m still excited over them.  I’ve got a good chunk done, and I know there’s still a good chunk left.  So I’m happy even though I’m failing.

But yeah.  I need to stop procrastinating and get back to pretending to get work done heh

I’m too tired to write a title

NaNoWriMo has officially started (at least in my part of the world) and I already feel fucked over and screwed. Which is definitely not a good place to be feeling and it’s rather discouraging to begin with. I’m apparently setting myself up for failure.

This month is quite frankly the busiest month I’ve had in AGES. I’ve got an intensive two-day course on a weekend coming up. I’ve got three birthdays that I’ve promised hand-made presents for. My grandma is having surgery and I’m expected to help play care-taker. I’m covering multiple shifts at work, working overtime, and working shifts I’m not used to doing anymore. I’ll be training our new employee. And to top it all off – I think I’m getting sick again.

I fucked myself over in the pre-planning. Trouble is that I’ve got one plot in my head and a completely different set of characters talking. And I can’t put them together. So I’ve decided that I’m going to write whatever I can – be it both or something else or whatever comes to mind. I need to relax and be encouraged – two things that are seriously lacking.

I’ve wanted to do this for so long. And I’m terrified already. Although I’ve conveniently terrified my way through two pages already, so it might help to be scared? Who the fuck knows.

At least it’s still fun.

And I know I was worth it – ’cause if I wasn’t worth it that makes me worse off than you are

I’m feeling a little random, let us start a list. (apparently I’m feeling all multiple too, since I’m the only one writing said list)

  • I want to participate in NaNoWriMo, however I don’t know. I don’t know what in the world I’d write about. There are millions of mini pieces of fiction on my hard drive (okay, maybe not a million, but damn quite a few) but I don’t know how to write anything more than a few pages anymore. And nothing I write ever ends up finished.
  • At work, they want me to go take some classes. Apparently they’ll pay for some of them. I would love to. I just have to make it fit in to my schedule. Am I crazy to want a certificate in the Psychology of Disasters? I might be. But that has to wait until my hours become a little more regular.
  • I’ve developed an interesting love for John Mayer after having an endless hate for him. Nothing personal, I just couldn’t stand his music. I’ve turned into a hypocrit, however, because now I have a love for it.
  • The title comes from the beautiful and amazingly talented Chantal Kreviazuk and her song “Surrounded”. Which I happen to love. And those lyrics always stick with me.
  • In the apartment sense, I’ve been discovering hidden boxes of my first love – books. And oh how I’ve missed my friends. I’ve found various new ones that I purchased prior to moving that I desperately want to curl up and read now. Problem is I’ve still got library books that are first priority. Since, you know, those ones have to go back.
  • Speaking of books… Library sale this weekend! Prices have gone up in the past years, but it goes to a good cause and is still cheap. Sure they’re a little worse for the wear, but it’s worth it. I love expanding my library. Although now I’m gonna have to find new places to put them all. I talk like I’ve bought a lot already :-$
  • Two concerts coming up. First two in what feels like ages. Tori Amos with my old best friend from highschool (ironically named Emily as well) and her boyfriend. At least, I think that’s the plan. I’m not 100% sure yet, but we’ll figure it out closer to time. Then the wonderful Matt Good. That is the concert I’ve been anxious to go to. The concert that I post-poned my summer cottage vacation to buy tickets to haha. I hope he’s feeling better soon though. It sucks to go to a regular job when you’re sick. I can’t imagine how it would be to perform when you’re sick.
  • Keiran’s coming to visit in a few days. I should be writing a list of things I have to do before she gets here instead of this BS of a list.
  • I am finally on the verge of not being sick. For real this time! 5.5 weeks of being ill off and on sure makes a person miserable. I’m not “better” yet, but I am feeling a heck of a lot better. Thank goodness. Now watch – now that I’ve said that I’m gonna be in trouble. I’d better figure out when they’re giving out flu shots this year.
  • I’ve had enough of this. I’ve had enough of a lot of things recently… I’ve had enough of being pushed around. But I am the type of person who’ll just shut their eyes and take the beating. That’s always how I’ve been.

Okay. The End.